The Body, our Greatest Relationship
Photo credit: Christopher Peddecord
As dancers, we demand a lot of our bodies. We become accustomed to pushing our bodies to their limits day in and day out. Performing at a high level becomes the norm. We expect more and more of our bodies and may even begin to take them for granted. Looking back on my career, I can see that I began to take everything my body did for granted. The ability to perform such complex and intricately beautiful movement is such a gift. Our bodies are a gift.
We are each given this vessel through which we experience life. And as time passes, the body experiences changes and challenges. Our experience of life can be significantly impacted if our body’s ability to function becomes compromised. So understanding our bodies, and their particular needs, can have a significant effect on our life experiences. As I look back on my career, one of the greatest gifts I received from dancing was having the opportunity to build a relationship with my body. Ballet offered me the chance to get to know my body in a very intimate way. I became more and more aware of my body’s needs and how to develop and nurture this relationship.
When I think of “relationship,” I think of commitment. I think of an opportunity for growth and learning. Relationships take time and patience. They take love, understanding and compassion. To have healthy relationships involves communication, compromise, and healthy self-esteem. So when we think about how we behave toward our body, how are we treating that relationship? Are we listening when our body communicates to us? Do we allow ourselves to compromise when we are demanding too much of our body and actually take care of it’s needs? Are we committed to caring for the body we are in? Do we love and accept our body and have healthy self-esteem? Are we curious to discover how to operate in our body best? To see how we can create the best possible relationship in our bodies? Can we get curious to see where our bodies can exceed our mental limitations?
Dance offered me a chance to get to know my body and work with my body in a way that many people never have the chance to experience. So often in our modern society, we are encouraged to operate more in the mental plane, and less in the physical. When we continually operate from this place, we begin to lose the connection to our body’s innate intelligence. Modern lives do not provide enough opportunities to move the body on a regular basis and nurture our relationships with our bodies. And I believe too many people operate from a place of being at odds with their body. Perhaps they are frustrated by the way it does or doesn't function. Maybe they don’t like the way their body looks. The relationship with their body becomes a toxic ongoing struggle and fight.
Dancer, perhaps you are reading this and are questioning the relationship you have with your body. Maybe you're asking yourself if you’ve been unkind, maybe even abusive to your body, to your vessel. Remember, a relationship is about constant evolution and growth. It is never too late to re-evaluate and change your relationship with your body for the better. As I’ve moved from the role of dancer to ballet teacher, my hope is to encourage students to create healthy relationships with their bodies. And let me also acknowledge and say, I am sorry if you have had teachers or instructors that have criticized your physical form. I am so sorry that that happened to you, and I want you to know that your body is not your dancing, your art, or your expression. My suggestion is to look at your experience with dance as a way of cultivating nourishing movement and expression within your body. To allow your body’s movement to be an expression of your soul.
My belief is that your dancing will be different when you truly honor and listen to your body. When you love your body and you feel at home in it, it will be visible in your dancing. So with that in mind, is it possible to notice when you feel invigorated and alive in your body? Does it feel satisfying to use your muscles? What does it feel like to explore your body’s abilities and potential? Instead of operating from a place of punishing our bodies, what if we celebrate the incredible things our bodies execute as dancers?
Furthermore, can you look at this as the beginning of a lifetime relationship with your body? Please understand that this is one of the longest and most important relationships of your life. It will continue long after your dancing career is over. So while you are still dancing, can you cultivate healthy practices and mindsets that you can take with you through life? Can we let go of the practice of abandoning and sacrificing our body’s needs? Is it possible to stop giving away our power to the people at the front of the room and instead trust the innate wisdom of our bodies? Can we work from a place of love and compassion? Can we show up to honestly meet our body’s needs? Can we treat our bodies with respect and acknowledge everything our bodies do for us on a daily basis? Can we begin to notice and appreciate everything from simply walking, or digesting food, to performing and executing complex movement day in and day out? Can you be truly grateful for your body’s ability to dance? And what does it feel like to dance from a place of gratitude and celebration instead of punishment and forcing? Can you create a home in your body? To make your body a place that is loving and most of all, safe. This physical form is your home, let it be one that is well taken care of. Let it be a place of love and compassion. That is your true nature. Claim it. It is yours.